Last month was a busy month for me. I visited multiple cities to speak and empower sisters. I love it! My last event was down in Savannah, Georgia. I had planned to enjoy the beach with my mentee after speaking to this amazing group. I also had another friend that I took with me, and I realized that I needed to accept that she was coming. Ruby. Ruby is my oldest friend. She’s been in my life since the age of 11. She and I haven’t always been best friends. Only recently have I come to realize that she is actually a friend. Ruby, is what I named my cycle.
I had this epiphany that at that time of the month, there is an entire metamorphosis that takes place. I become a different version of myself. Ruby appears, and she is straightforward, blunt, fatigued, and boy does she have a sweet tooth. I envy her ability to speak exactly what she wants and she couldn’t care less about how the rest of the world sees her. She relishes in comfort foods, sweets, and chips. I stopped treating her like a “visitor” and began welcoming her as a “friend”. Maybe it’s because I got older and busier and very seldom got those days to do nothing and pig out. Maybe I began looking forward to Ruby because she gave me what I was afraid to snag for myself.
What I learned from accepting Ruby is that self care is utterly important. Ruby has taught me to listen to my body, because it’s always speaking to us. It tells us when we’re motivated, satiated, excited, frustrated, and stressed. But more importantly, by accepting Ruby as a friend, my cycle is bearable. It actually doesn’t cause me as much pain as before. I prepare for her with the things she likes most. We plan her favorite activities (usually Netflix and chill weekends). I keep my heating pad on the ready, which astoundingly, I haven’t had to use as much. By welcoming her and being thankful for her arrival, I’ve appreciated the process of my womanhood. My cycle is not a burden, it is a blessing.
Each month, I am reminded of the complex beauty that is me. The beautiful power of my creator. The purpose of my being, not necessarily to mother a child (I have no kids), but a symbol of my creativity. In my creativity, I bring things to life. I am empowered by Ruby. Ruby is teaching me to enjoy the life I create one month at a time. She checks on me every 28 days, and she will be honest and blunt about who I am as a woman. Ruby arrived yesterday, so quietly, so calm. I welcomed her, and we’ve had an amazing weekend together. She made me slow down and really enjoy my weekend.
I hope that this will change your mindset on how you view this beautiful process that we experience each month. Have you named your cycle? What do you guys do when your girl comes to visit? Let me know in the comments below and tell me how welcoming her has changed your monthly visits.